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Text message arrogance?
#1
Has anyone ever been accused of coming across as arrogant/too formal in text messages? I've had a few people say that to me before because I tend to use full sentences that are correctly punctuated and generally avoid "text speak" and such. Really, I'm just trying to make myself clear so that others don't have to try to decode my message. (Sometimes I get a text and don't know if I'm supposed to answer it or solve for X!) I never correct other people's grammar or anything so I don't know why the mere use of complete and correctly punctuated sentences makes me "arrogant" sounding. Anybody have any similar experiences?
“Si hortum in bibliotheca habes, nullus deerit” -Cicero
"Well, the devil made me do it the first time. The second time I done it on my own" -Waylon Jennings
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#2
While I've never been accused of sound arrogant in text messages, I do the same thing that you described here. One of my friends, an ENFJ who's become very interested in MBTI, has pointed out many times how the differences between us is clear in the way we talk (or rather, type). To quote her, I "give off an educated and formal air in my messages, while [she] is always using 18395 emoticons." (Note- I don't remember the exact number she said, but it was something like that).
Of course, I'm sure that there are plenty of people who I've had to text/email (probably for school) who think I sound arrogant, but don't tell me.
"Not all writers are power-hungry madmen...some are power-hungry madwomen!" -P. Bosch
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#3
I find that text-speak is actually useful way of conveying emotions when someone can't hear your voice. Even small decisions such as leaving out a period or hitting enter twice can affect your tone. I use abbreviations and emoticons, but in a very controlled way so as to convey the exact tone I want. That's why writing with correct punctuation and spelling can seem formal, because it's not as good at communicating tone. Text-speak is a useful tool--use it!

You can always tell when people are texting someone they don't know well because their text-speak is more stiff and formal (unless of course they just naturally write that way).
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#4
I'd agree with loolitay. Language is fluid. Vocabulary, grammar, and spelling are simply tools to convey information. They work extremely well when space is not limited and ideas can be fully developed, but they stink when rapid communication is needed.

In addition, there are times when breaking the rules conveys information more effectively than following them. 1337 speak is the 21st century version of street talk. It's intended to draw others into a circle of terms with a shared vocabulary - a type of code to define community. By using 1337 speak you are communicating in a special shared vocabulary with the recipient and so you are connecting with them as a special group. Originally it was so effective at doing this that hackers were able to communicate with each other in clear text via Internet bulletin boards, but it looked like gibberish to the casual observer.

Emoticons, on the other hand, were invented to remove some of the ambiguity inherent in textual communications where plain text can be misunderstood.

Together they can convey subtext and emotion much more quickly and efficiently than following formal grammatical rules. Think of it like the difference between prose and poetry. Poetry uses rhythm, rhyme, and odd structures to convey multiple subtexts. Through 1337 speak and emoticons we can "encode" more information in a text which inherently limits you to 160 characters. Consider the different ways I can send a message to my wife. Take a second to read each one and "feel" the emotional subtext:
  1. I love you.
  2. I luv you
  3. I luv u
  4. i <3 u
  5. I luv u :-P
  6. I luv u ;-)
  7. I luv u :-)
  8. I love you :-(
  9. I h8 u :-D
Each one sends a different emotional sub-text to her. Which do you think she likes to read the most? The first one is just a sentence. It's flat and lifeless. The fourth is common, but implies a code and so a secret depth only we share. The fifth is playful. The sixth is suggestive. The eighth is a sad apology. The ninth is playful again. By using the different modes of texting, emoticons, and 1337 speak you can make it into an extremely compact and effective method of communication. It can be artistic, playful, and emotional in ways that regular writing may only achieve through numerous sentences.

Remember too that most people see texting as a short-hand version of communication. It's intended to be rapid and informal. So, by closely following the rules for grammar you are inherently conveying a formal subtext, which your friend is keying into. It's like wearing a tuxedo to a basketball game. Everyone's going to wonder why the guy is all dressed up. Is he in the wrong place? Is he just passing through on the way to something else? Is he part of a ceremony? Is he making a statement? Now, what if he wore that tuxedo all the time? Now people are really going to wonder what he's doing or what's wrong with him.

I would guess that your friend is really saying, "Y R U always dressed like a penguin?! :-P " Big Grin
It is better to be alone than in bad company. -- George Washington
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#5
(02-19-2014, 12:21 PM)JTS Wrote: I'd agree with loolitay. Language is fluid. Vocabulary, grammar, and spelling are simply tools to convey information. They work extremely well when space is not limited and ideas can be fully developed, but they stink when rapid communication is needed.

In addition, there are times when breaking the rules conveys information more effectively than following them. 1337 speak is the 21st century version of street talk. It's intended to draw others into a circle of terms with a shared vocabulary - a type of code to define community. By using 1337 speak you are communicating in a special shared vocabulary with the recipient and so you are connecting with them as a special group. Originally it was so effective at doing this that hackers were able to communicate with each other in clear text via Internet bulletin boards, but it looked like gibberish to the casual observer.

Emoticons, on the other hand, were invented to remove some of the ambiguity inherent in textual communications where plain text can be misunderstood.

Together they can convey subtext and emotion much more quickly and efficiently than following formal grammatical rules. Think of it like the difference between prose and poetry. Poetry uses rhythm, rhyme, and odd structures to convey multiple subtexts. Through 1337 speak and emoticons we can "encode" more information in a text which inherently limits you to 160 characters. Consider the different ways I can send a message to my wife. Take a second to read each one and "feel" the emotional subtext:
  1. I love you.
  2. I luv you
  3. I luv u
  4. i <3 u
  5. I luv u :-P
  6. I luv u ;-)
  7. I luv u :-)
  8. I love you :-(
  9. I h8 u :-D
Each one sends a different emotional sub-text to her. Which do you think she likes to read the most? The first one is just a sentence. It's flat and lifeless. The fourth is common, but implies a code and so a secret depth only we share. The fifth is playful. The sixth is suggestive. The eighth is a sad apology. The ninth is playful again. By using the different modes of texting, emoticons, and 1337 speak you can make it into an extremely compact and effective method of communication. It can be artistic, playful, and emotional in ways that regular writing may only achieve through numerous sentences.

Remember too that most people see texting as a short-hand version of communication. It's intended to be rapid and informal. So, by closely following the rules for grammar you are inherently conveying a formal subtext, which your friend is keying into. It's like wearing a tuxedo to a basketball game. Everyone's going to wonder why the guy is all dressed up. Is he in the wrong place? Is he just passing through on the way to something else? Is he part of a ceremony? Is he making a statement? Now, what if he wore that tuxedo all the time? Now people are really going to wonder what he's doing or what's wrong with him.

I would guess that your friend is really saying, "Y R U always dressed like a penguin?! :-P " Big Grin

I see what you're getting at. I guess I was just never included in the "group" as far as text speak. I didn't spend much time on the internet as a kid (I grew up in the age of dial up) and I was in college before I got a phone that could really text. I suppose I just never learned the "language" and it literally takes me a few minutes to figure out what people are saying when they use it. Being non-fluent, I don't really use the language myself.
“Si hortum in bibliotheca habes, nullus deerit” -Cicero
"Well, the devil made me do it the first time. The second time I done it on my own" -Waylon Jennings
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#6
When I have sent text messages to my best friend he had never reply to me for the condition of the arrogance by the rude behavior. When I got him online from the https://bestessayservicesreview.com/essayshark-review/ website then I conflicted with him for this arrogance.
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#7
There are many kinds of text messages I have got but the most arrogant thing is it's notification sound. Some text message are so symbolic that I feel harder to understand what my sender try to tell! Cumunista
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